Thursday, December 8, 2011


What a crazy few weeks it's been....Jordan and I have been busy with doctors appointments and preparing for our baby girls...both stressful and exciting, but mostly exciting!

Last Saturday was my last day of work for a while at the salon. I walked in bright and early to find my chair fully decked out in pink & white balloons and LOTS of them :) The girls had a cake and adorable cookies and made the day so special, I'm so blessed to have so many people that love and support me and I'm so grateful for those girls.

Back when I first decided to start my maternity leave in December, I felt like I'd have so much time to prepare, get things ready, etc, seeing as the girls due date is February 25th. Now because the "due date" has been moved, and with only 3 and a half weeks to go, it seems like the time is going to go by so fast, and to be perfectly honest, I couldn't be more thankful for that. I was talking to my mom yesterday and telling her how happy I am that this part of our journey is coming to an end, and the next part is beginning. Although we are going into their birth with a lot of "what if's" and unknowns, it just gives me so much more peace to know that our babies will be out of my womb, which seems to be a scary and unpredictable place for them, and that we will be able to see them face to face. I keep thinking about what it's going to be like to see them for the first time and I couldn't be more excited to just stare at them for hours.

We had a bit of a crazy day yesterday, with our appointment at 8:30 which is usually only supposed to take about an hour. Needless to say, I didn't leave Albany Med until about 2:30. Here's how it all went down...
We got to our appointment, and let me just say that we had previously made this appointment specifically to see a Dr. that we have been seeing from the beginning, the Chief of MFM at Albany Med, and the one who knows our situation best. So, they call our name for the ultrasound, and the tech who was about to do our ultrasound was one we have had once before. For anyone that knows Jordan and I, we are pretty easy going and willing to give people the benefit of the doubt in most situations. Now this tech is sweet, kind and professional, but it is written all over her face that she is new, and that she doesn't really know 100% of what she is doing yet. When we had her before, she kept mixing up the measurements of Baby A and Baby B, and coincidentally did the same thing this time. I asked the tech if our doctor was going to see us that day, and she said he wasn't available, but that we'd be seeing a newer doctor. As soon as she left the room to get the doctor, I burst into tears. Like I said, in most cases I am willing to give anyone a chance, but when it comes to my babies, who are in an extremely high risk situation, I'm not quite as willing to let things slide.
A few minutes later, the doctor and tech came in, and again, the doctor was very nice and very professional, but she had NO idea about our particular situation, hadn't read any of the notes from our previous appointments, and was more impressed with Jordan than anything because he basically had to teach her about our diagnosis and what the doctors were looking for. Not the most comforting when your husband knows more about the medical situation than the doctor who is supposed to determine if your babies are in distress and ready to be delivered that day or not.
Not to mention that this particular doctor is new at knowing how to scan ultrasounds, so the tech had to walk her through step by step how to get the babies dopplers, and she assured us that their dopplers were both normal. Thank the Lord that Jordan and I have been to enough appointments and have educated ourselves enough that we knew this wasn't true, because although A's has been normal all along, Baby B's has not been "normal" since I can remember, and that's why we're here in the first place.

Fortunately, I had an OB appointment scheduled for after the ultrasound, and a supportive and fired up husband who insisted on staying with me so we could get this all straightened out and hopefully figure out where to go from here. We met with a different OB for my appointment, and she actually knew the background on our case, and felt that it was completely unacceptable that we had not seen our doctor in weeks, and apologized profusely, before Jordan and I even had a chance to say anything. That was definitely the Lord, stepping in and giving us someone who wanted to advocate for us. She immediately left the room and as far as we know, gave the staff a piece of her mind about why we hadn't been in with our doctor for weeks, and why we kept being shuffled between different, new doctors. She came back and said that we would not leave that day without being scanned by our doctor, and that from now on, we will insist to see him, no matter what. What a huge burden lifted off of our shoulders, that someone actually realized the severity of this situation and was on our side. Again, thank you Lord.

The doctor also insisted that we (finally) get a tour of the NICU, which we have been waiting for for about a month, and she got us in within the hour. We met with one of the doctors of the NICU, who was amazing, and pretty much gave us a run down of how things would go right after the girls were born and what to expect for their stay in the hospital. Every question we asked he had an answer for, and gave me so much comfort as a mother because he seemed to really understand my fears and concerns. We were able to go into one of the rooms where the babies were, and I just kept praying that the Lord would help me keep it together and not break down and cry. Thankfully, I did, and seeing those little ones hooked up to all of the monitors and tubes actually gave me some kind of comfort, knowing that they are getting the best care possible, and that our girls will be getting the same thing.

So, after our NICU appointment, we went back to the OB office to get re-scanned with our doctor. He scanned both of them, and did their dopplers, and again said that A's was normal, and B's was intermittently absent, which is how it has been. We are obviously still in prayer that we will go in one of these appointments and B's will be normal as well, but we are grateful that her's is not completely absent or reverse, which is the worst case scenario. God is sustaining her, and we are trusting He is giving her exactly what she needs to thrive and grow into the little girl He wants her to be.

Our doctor said he now wants to see us twice a week (next Monday and Thursday), and wants to start doing non-stress tests to monitor the babies and keep a little of a closer look on them. We set a date for their birthday, a c-section on Friday December 30th, and the doctor said that it is good to have an ending point if the babies make it this far. We are praying and feel at peace that the Lord is going to bring them to this date, and have faith that He will carry us through the next 3 and a half weeks.

On a lighter note, I washed and put away all of the girls adorable clothes today, and Jordan and I have a date to finish their room on Saturday. Pictures will be coming for sure :)

We are so thankful for your prayers, and grateful beyond words for the support that everyone has shown us. Please continue to pray specifically for these things:
1. That the Lord will protect the hearts and brains of our little girls, that every flow of blood between them and to them would be beneficial to their growth and development and not harmful to their little bodies
2. That their lungs would continue to develop as they should and that the steriods would help develop them a little faster than normal so they are able to breathe on their own and not need as much assistance in the NICU
3. That the Lord would bring our little loves to Dec 30th safe and sound, and that surgery and delivery would go smoothly
4. That the doctors would be amazed at how well the babies are doing in and out of the womb, and that there would be no other explanation other than the Lord Jesus protecting them. That we would be able to share His love with everyone we come in contact with through our girls miraculous lives.

Thank you so much! More again soon....


  1. prayers for your babies! prayers to you and your husband.

  2. Sounds like you have had so much patience and serenity about this all and I give you so much credit for that. It definitely helps your girls if you two are calm and loving.
    I will have you in my thoughts and can't wait to hear more updates as things get closer.
    Thank you again for sharing your story.

  3. Hey, Carolyn,

    I think of you and your precious family often... I am so heavy-hearted! :( Just wanted you to know that I am praying.

    With Much Love,

  4. You don't know me, of course, but I am a friend of the Hastings family. I've been praying for you and for your precious sweethearts. Praying that the Lord will sustain you and give you the strength you need. I'm so glad you were able to see your doctor and tour the NICU. Important stuff for your peace of mind.
    Still praying
    Annie Pfannkoch

  5. Thankful you have a date for delivery, Carolyn! Following her treatment for breast cancer, my daughter taught me the importance of having an "advocate" with you. I'm so thankful your husband is comfortable doing that. I'll continue praying for you all.

    Debi Costine

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  7. I printed out your four prayer requests and we will pray them nightly. I read every word of your blog & feel your nervousness and worries...but most of all your joy and the incredibly love between you and your husband. My wish for Christmas--I don't want "things" (except a big crockpot)--is to hear you are carried safely through this & have your beautiful babies for Christmas. Much love to you & to your husband--for being so strong and supportive--as a real man should be. Love and prayers coming your way daily.

  8. Thank you so much for sharing an update! Praying for you as you approach December 30th...praying for health, growth and protection for your girls, for wisdom for the doctors and peace for your and your husband as you get ready to meet your babies. You have been an amazing witness for the Lord already. May all of this be to His glory.

  9. We will continue praying for you. You and your husband are showing such an immeasurable amount of faith through all of this which I can only imagine is making our God extremely proud!

  10. From one Carolyn to another=
    My prayers are with you and Jordan for your baby girls. I have three girls of my own. I know that GOD will work a miracle and those babies will be delivered happy, healthy, and to the amazement of the medical staff perfect in every way! We serve a GOD that is bigger than it all and is able to reach down and touch your babies while they are still inside and make them grow and thrive. You are always in my thoughts and prayers. GOD bless!

  11. I will continue to pray for all of you! Wow, that would have definitely upset me too, if I didn't see my regular doctor- especially in this situation. Thankfully that doctor insisted you see your regular one. I'll keep praying for God's protective hand on your precious girls and that only His name will be praised through this.

  12. So happy things worked out with the doctor situation! Praying hard that the Lord continues to sustain both your beautiful girls AND you and your husband over this next month, and I cant wait to see photos of your sweet new family super soon!

  13. I am still praying for your family. I am thankful that you are getting some answers and are being helped through this process. xoxo

  14. Carolyn and Jordan-

    I am a friend of Nancy's from Terra Nova. We met briefly at their wedding celebration here in town. My husband and I were with our son in the AMC NICU/PICU in March. Just to encourage you, we had a wonderful experience with the medical staff despite very difficult circumstances with our son. Dr. Rios was our attending and he was fantastic! I work in health care, so I have high expectations! I think there is wisdom in assuming the need to advocate for yourselves and your girls--health care staff are by no means perfect, even though most are very well intentioned!

    I also wanted to share the name of a NICU nurse who attends Terra Nova--Jeanie Layola. She's not working on the 30th, but said she'd introduce herself on the 31st. We found it so comforting having a friendly face and to know that she was bringing not only her skills as a nurse, but God's presence to the NICU.

    Will continue praying for your family as the 30th approaches and in the days following...